I was tagged by the lovely Jeannette over at Autism Mumma to remember my highs and lows of 2014. So here they are…
1. What was your happiest event?
Without doubt becoming a family of four. It was a very big and scary step for us considering we were advised against it, but Little E has completed our family and Ethan loves having a sibling, most of the time!
2. What was the saddest thing to happen?
I feel like we live on a roller coaster of extreme highs and lows most of the time in our house, but I can gratefully and thankfully say I can’t think of anything that would make me say 2014 contained a sad event.
3. What was the most unlikely thing to happen that actually went ahead and did?
I still won’t believe it until we actually have a start date but Ethan got a placement at a Special School against all the odds. It was a very tough battle and I’m hoping it is the right choice for our little superstar.
4. Who let you down?
I don’t feel we were let down knowingly, well I hope not, but we are discovering that the lack of autism understanding is letting us down. Ethan’s needs can, at time, take over our every thought when wanting to do something socially. It’s sad to admit that sometimes it is easier not to go somewhere, or do something. The reality is Darren and I really do need to get out and away from the autism bubble every now and then, it just isn’t that easy.
5. Who supported you?
My poor mum and dad are always on call. They hold my hand through every appointment, meeting and everything in-between! I wish they didn’t have to but with Darren’s new job and shift pattern it is getting easier for all of us.
Distance stops Ethan’s other grandparents helping out as much as they wish they could. Regular visits and phone calls are always on hand.
Social media has been an amazing find for me, it has connected me to other autism mum’s that get it.
I have also found some autism mum’s in real life and a sneaky coffee shop catch up has done wonders. We really need to do more of these in 2015, with Ethan starting school I’m hoping it will get easier to do.
6. Tell us what you learned.
Good or bad, there is never a dull moment!
7. Tell us what made you laugh.
We often giggle because if you don’t laugh you will end up crying. The last thing I remembering laughing at was Ethan making Little E giggle.
8. Tell us the things that made you cry.
I honestly feel that my emotions are all over the place and I’m always a few moments away from crying. I actually put off watching Frozen as I’m sure I would be in a mess by the end of it!
I did expect to have a bit of a cry after having Little E. I broke down in next when I had Ethan. This time I think I was too busy for crying but I think it has come out in other ways.
I did cry when we were told about Ethan’s school placement, I wasn’t expecting this. Our case worker did make me sit down for the news as she didn’t want to bring on an early labour. She was very nice and stayed on the phone whilst I cried and then whilst I laughed for crying!
9. Tell us three things your child or children did to make you feel proud.
Ethan welcomed 2014 in with a word, Hello. I’m so pleased this word has stuck around for the whole year, my heart still melts when I hear him say it.
Starting to drink from a cup. I never thought we would lose the beaker without a fight but we did. Ditching the beaker made him grow up overnight.
Being an amazing big brother. He has accepted Little E and shows her affection all the time. It is hard work but so worth it.
10. Tell us the things that made you proud of yourself.
Writing the letter to the panel to put Ethan’s case forward for a place at the special school. It felt like I was writing an essay, it took three whole days to write and it did turn into nine pages but it worked.
11. Tell us the challenges you overcame.
Having another baby. I did my best to ignore that I was pregnant. I was so scared about how we would welcome our baby into the world. I thought I would be able to have an elective c-section, no questions asked. It wasn’t that easy but the fact that Little E needed to arrive early forced that decision. I was convinced I was going to die, all my fears soon melted away in the theater.
12. Tell us the things you would like to change about your life in 2015.
Be more organized and to be able to control the anxiety I’m starting to suffer from.
I tag @SitstillMonkeys, @MyLifeAsAMummyx and @mumturnedmom if they would like to take part.